'I am embarrassed for his teacher': Parent complains about nonsensical grading rubric for eighth grader son's school project

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Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Mar 4, 2024 12:00 PM EST

One problem that every kind of teacher has to try and solve is how you capture and keep the attention of a class. What might work in one year totally fails the next. If you've been in the profession for a long time, Gen Alpha might not be captivated by the same tactics as millennials were. 

We've all seen educators be ruthlessly mocked—or worse, be given a patronizing pat on the head—for trying to incorporate outdated memes and slang into their classes. However, there are occasions when criticism for trying to be down with the kids may well be deserved. 

This seems to be the conclusion from a recent popular Reddit post, in which a parent complained of the nonsensical grading rubric their son had been given for a school project. Incorporating contemporary song lyrics, nobody could make out what the objectives were meant to be. It just goes to show that sometimes, it's preferable to be boring.

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  • 01
    Categories Presentation Appearance Content Organization Bombastic 4 This hit, that ice cold that white gold. straight masterpiece. You got your Gucci and Louis Vuitton on-it made me look! Unstoppable! You're a Porcha with no brakes. Baby you're a firework, you showed us what you're worth. Fire 3 You're a smooth operator, a very smooth operator. Thrift shopping grandpa style. You did your hair toss, and everything looked good. You are good, you are gold, kind of presentation that can't be sold. G
    via stolenbyfire
  • 02
    My kid is doing a project requiring him to create his own legislation. My son has spent hours working on this and I am quite proud of what he has written. Today he sends me a screenshot of the rubric his teacher is planning to use for grading. I am honestly embarrassed for his teacher, and feeling sorry for him. Come on- do better. For context I am married to a teacher so I always try to empathize and not be "that parent." But seriously.
    via stolenbyfire
  • 03
    NerdSlamPo 8h somehow the most infuriating thing about this is the spelling of "Porcha"
    via NerdSlamPo
  • 04
    _austinight_6h For me, it's the improper placement of the apostrophe in y'all
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  • 05
    bullpup1337 5h For me, thinking that good appearance equates to wearing big brand designer clothes instead of simple, high quality garments.
    via bullpup1337
  • 06
    rubbery_anus 4h It's a song lyric, they're all song lyrics, so it's going to be pretty hard to find a pop lyric that advocates the wearing of simple, high quality garments.
    via rubbery__anus
  • 07
    dlchira 9h I'm an older scientist (44) on a team with a bunch of truly delightful, half-my-age tech wizards. Today, my boss told me an algorithm I designed was "GOATed." I was so proud.
    via dichira
  • 08
    Human-Routine244 8h This isn't about slang. It's about there being literally no rubric here. It's supposed to tell you what's expected of you to get good marks on each section. It's a way of proving that you aren't just impression marking and giving kids tangible ways to improve their work. This is a bunch of nothing. The teacher may as well have said "excellent: work was excellent-good: work was good-sound: work was sound" etc
    via Human-Routine244
  • 09
    drgigantor 6h That's what they were trying to say?? Jesus Christ those kids are screwed. I've known some real dumbasses who inexplicably went on to be teachers but I've only ever known of one who was this dumb and shallow. Not someone I knew, a teacher I actually had. She couldn't read, she couldn't spell even with the material in front of her face, she didn't know anything about anything, she just spent all her time trying to get the popular kids to like her (a majority of her students bombed t
    via drgigantor
  • 10
    Drake_the_troll 10h how do you do fellow kids? : Acceptable-Ad8780 9h Reply 45.0k MUSIC BARD How do you do, fellow kids? peacock
    via Drake_the_troll
  • 11
    FatFaceFaster 9h In addition to the clear "how do you do fellow kids" vibe here... a rubric should actually be objective and clear as to what the expectations are and what they received the grade they received. "Excuse me Ms Smith why did I score so low on my speech?" "Well it wasn't Ice cold or white gold enough"
    via FatFaceFaster
  • 12
    ThisIsTheBookAcct 8h Yes. They know that four is best and 1 is worst, but how to they get the 4? What does a 4 mean in the context of the finished product.
    via ThisIsTheBookAcct
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    RefrigeratorMean235 8h I went to this school and graduated with an alligator in spelling
    via RefrigeratorMean235
  • 14
    Overall-Zebra9976 9h Ok, so it's a serious assessment and he wants to be evaluated properly. Not something like "write a haiku about your favorite president then present it to the class in the style of Hamlet, wearing your best period piece not from that period."
    via Overall-Zebra9976
  • 15
    TheMagarity 9h Why is Gucci both the level 2 header but the description of level 4 in the second category?
    via TheMagarity
  • 16
    rollinthatsublyfe 8h Your kid is taking this assignment more seriously than his teacher.
    via rollinthatsublyfe
  • 17
    sushicat01 7h I'm looking at it from the perspective of maybe he knew some students wouldn't be engaged and was trying to promote some enthusiasm and appeal to his students thinking he related to them. Was there an additional list of requirements to follow so the students could have some academic rubric to follow?
    via sushicat01
  • 18
    cherry_sundae88 10h i mean, cringe but they're just wholesome jokes on pop lyrics. i think it's worth a giggle along with an eyeroll.
    via cherry_sundae88
  • 19
    ADarkSpirit 9h As a teacher I would love to make kids cringe like this, but not on an assessment rubric. Rubrics should be clean, concise, and very easily understood. All expectations should be plain in the rubric. From this, I can see what the teacher is grading on, but have absolutely no idea how to actually get the grade I want based on the rubric. And that's the problem- the whole point of using rubrics is to convey expectations.
    via ADarkSpirit
  • 20
    erksplat 10h Given the misspelling of Porsche, the teacher is likely a doofus.
    via erksplat
  • 21
    Ben Hairy420 9h To me, this seems more of a facepalm rather than mildly infuriating. Like, come on, teacher, this rubric isn't clear enough for students to understand. It also doesn't address the measurable data of the project. I'd like to assume the teacher is going to use an actual rubric and this was a silly little joke, but.... Who knows lol
    via BenNHairy420

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